Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Hi Loves!

After the picture shenanigans (no one could see them)...I have caved.  Officially.  
I am kind of nervous about this. I do not like being on the grid. But, I'm sure people like my secret agent father have access to my gmail account as well, so here begins the blog I swore I'd never have.

Rules: This is a closed blog which means only people I invite can follow.  You can, however, comment till your hearts content.  Also, if you know of someone else who'd like in on the snark, let me know and I will add them.  And lastly, I have enabled it so that, if you want, you can share blog snippets via. e-mail with others.  

The first entry is a repeat, but this time fun pictures come with it!

5/13-Snark Trek

It got great reviews. It opened huge.  And I have yet to see Star Trek.  
But, I will.  Oh, I will.  Because I, unlike those sorority bitches who claim to be nerds and drop Will Ferrell references for the sole purpose of getting frat boys to like them, am a nerd.  Unless you have waited outside of a Barnes and Noble at midnight for a copy of Harry Potter, or legitimately watched and have a favorite Star Trek episode (mine is "The Trouble With Tribbles") then you are not a nerd (or, at the very least, you need to be taken under review).  So, for those of you who have/or are planning on boarding the USS Enterprise, what do you think?


My initial thoughts?  Chris Pine (Kirk) and Zachary Whatever (Siler from Heroes) (Spock) look just like Shatner and Nimoy. Perfect.  But I am in the minority here: Don't think Pine is hott. At all. He looks like the guy who tries to ruffie you at a band party.  Hmm...must avoid thinking this while in the theater.


There were two biggies this week. The White House Correspondents Dinner (we can debate the legitimacy of this piece of shit event later...I mean, I love them, but who in their right mind thinks Natalie Portman and James Franco deserve to go to the White House to schmooze only to then pretend to have something important to say about...insert cause here) and the Met Costume Institute Gala (indisputably awesome).
Here are the fashion misses. And one shinning (although it will be debated) beacon of a hit.

Going to Prom.  
The first link is a picture of her at the White House Dinner (sorry, couldn't upload it). The others are from I don't know when and I don't really care. Just wanted to prove my point that she is a waste of red carpet space.  Seriously, Eva, we get it. You like ugly colors, fish-tail dresses, and looking like a mermaid en route to senior prom.

Next...another link...this time to a round up of Met fashion. Worst: Oh, too many to choose from. Very, very poor showing this year. Esp. Gisele Bundchen. You DO NOT ever, under any circumstances dress like a stripper and then attend the Gala.  I don't care if your quarterback husband hasn't impregnated you.  Best: You all won't like it, but... Leighton Meester. Leave it to Blair Waldorf.  She took a risk.  THAT is what the Gala is all about.  You are supposed to look editorial, not Eva Longoria boring/fugly.  Leighton looks fab. She also look like she's 22 and not a slut. Kudos.

And lastly: Fantaorgasmic

In breaking was announced today that everyone's favorite vampire and my own personal shamefuck Robert Pattinson (from "Twilight") is doing a new film with none other than the god of sex, stage, falsetto singing, and cinema himself...Hugh Jackman.  According to Variety, they are starring with Rachel Weisz (heart her) in a Western.  Weisz's husband's gets killed by a bunch of Indians and her kid gets carted off into captivity.  Jackman plays the ranger who comes to save the day and "ravage" her. Pattinson plays her hostage son.  It will probably be an awful movie.  But I LOVE westerns.  And you simply can NOT get any better than a tag team of Pattinson and Jackman in a 2 hour montage of facial scruff, sweat stained shirts and kerchiefs, riding, legs straddled on horses through New Mexico.  Who's up for a midnight showing?

Love you all!


  1. Could not agree more about Eva. Makes me want to vom down the front of my shirt. Which is especially remarkable since I particularly have a thing for Hispanic women and usually loooooooove them! She's so painfully promtastic and assimilated.

  2. God, so much here to love. Here's another epic, epic Eva fail:
    BORING. awful. doesn't even fit well!

    Another boring celbutard style: Lauren Conrad. Totally predictable and boring, every time.

    Now the met gala, that was fun! You are right, that's where you need to take editorial risks and Leighton Meester brought it, as did Rihanna. The Oscars are high school prom compared to this event.

    Also, totally agree with you that Chris Pine is not hott. I think he's hot to the gays, but not us straight wimminz.

    R-Patz, Hugh Jackman, AND Rachel Weisz? This film will make me bisexual.

    Thank you so, so much for starting this blog. I spend far too much of my time silently judging and now I have an outlet too! And hey, other commenters + Leanne, if you ever disagree with what I say, please, say it! It's fun to discuss :-)

  3. Rihanna. Good point. I liked the idea. For some reason, though, it wasn't a total hit for me. I think it is because the tailoring was a little shoddy. There are like puckers in the fabric and it doesn't look as proportional as it (even in its crazy dimensionality) it should. But you're right. It was a fierce move.

  4. Leanne, this is funny. And this is Patrick. Oh, and that Patterson guy is, let me say it, HOTT. Yeth.

  5. Just can't really agree about Rihanna. Frankly, her presence at said event confuses me, and I can't find her worth a fashion mention! Obviously most hilarious is Tyra Banks. But when is that not the case? I apreesh my favorite gal Winona going with my black tights. Moss also looks amazing as usual, as well as Emmy. I bet Leo is embarrassed that he ever dated Gisele and is wishing that he had picked me.