On Ricky Gervais





Listen, I get that he was mean.  I get that he took un-fair left hooks to people.  Fuck, in less than five minutes the man absolutely destroyed Angelina Jolie, His Most Holiness Johnny Depp, an organized religion based in Hollywood that shall remain nameless out of fear for my personal safety, Charlie Sheen, hookers, and the entire Hollywood Foreign Press Agency (who hired him).


Of course it was mean-spirited, which is...


AS IT SHOULD BE!!!


If you are one of those people bitching about how Gervais "crossed the line" last night, then you can just fuck right off and never read my blog again.  I'm serious about that.  Because if you honestly thought that Gervais did anything wrong, then you and I can't be friends.


Let me clarify: not every joke was a great joke. I'll agree that some lines were more clever and better delivered than others.  In fact, some of his jokes fell flat.  But that's a different conversation. That's being critical of Gervais comedic craft and delivery. And that is NOT the argument raging in the Twitter-verse today.  The argument today is about whether or not he was "appropriate."  The conversation is that he was "too mean to the poor little celebrities who he insulted and hurt their poor wittle feewlings." 


Ugh. Some people have no f-cking sense.  THEY ARE CELEBRITIES!!! They make un-godly amounts of money shooting what are often times terrible movies. And this income allows them to go off and do whatever the f-ck they want with little to no concern about anything beyond their immediate desires.  Do you honestly think that most celebrities are nice people who put others first?  Do you think they are humble? Do you think they live "pure" "clean" "sober" lives? Do you think that they never lie, manipulate, or plot? Do you think they don't live in a permanent state of narcissism?  Do you really think that it's unfair for one man to get up and poke fun at them for ONE NIGHT OF THEIR LIVES?  





Please.  Johnny Depp can f-cking deal with it. He can put on his big boy pants and take one moment of not being fawned over.  And Charlie Sheen?  Don't even start with me.  Yeah, he's an addict.  But he's also a chronic asshole.  Take away the addiction and you would still have an asshole: a racist, misogynistic, unfaithful sober asshole.  So no, I don't feel bad that Gervais called him on it.  


And for those of you who were mad at his "I want to thank God for making me an atheist" line at the end of the night...let me tell you something.  I believe in God. And I was NOT offended.  And you shouldn't be either. Why? Two reasons. First, do you honestly believe that everyone who accepted their award and "thanked" God really lives like they appreciate or even acknowledge God? If you do, you're a fool.  


Also, in the same way that each and every person who wants to "thank God" has the right to do so, Gervais has the right to publicly declare atheism.  You now have literally no logical right to be offended by that comment.


And lastly, for those of you who didn't like the show because it made you "uncomfortable" to see the celebrities looking uncomfortable...you just have no sense of humor. Because that shit is hilarious.  





Have you ever seen an interview with a famous person? Have you ever seen a celebrity walk the Red Carpet?  They are sooooo confident, and self possessed, and "on."  They are actors for goodness sake.  Composure is their business. How great is it, then, to watch them freak out while struggling to keep their composure? To see Nicole Kidman's huge lips try not to frown in disapproval?  How funny is it to watch her pretend to be "cool" with Gervais's joking when you can clearly see that she is fuming inside (while also vowing not to eat for 8 weeks straight)?  


Guys, this is why awards shows put 5 different cameras on the 5 nominees as the winner's name is announced...to see the "fake" smiles.  For a split second, we get to watch the four losers' eyes turn red with demonic fury before the "oh, I'm so relieved they won and not me" face gets plastered on.  Come on, you have to love it.  Watching an actor's normally puffed up ego and confidence go down in flames is High Comedy.  Sorry if you are too dumb to get it.


No really. You might be stupid.  The reason American's don't like Gervais is because American's don't like or understand satire.  We like watching Will Ferrell fart and get hit in the testicles.  Because it's mindless.  And it doesn't really say anything about who we are as a people and what we value.  It doesn't challenge you while you laugh.


But Satire does.  Satire is defined as the process of "exposing human vices and follies to ridicule and scorn... ideally with the intent of shaming individuals, and society itself, into improvement...In satire, irony is millitant."


So yeah, Gervais was malicious.  He was sinister and mean. He ridiculed and shamed. He was not nice.  In short, he was the definition of Satire.  And, if you know about Gervais, he is an intellectual.  He knew what he was doing and meant to do it.


The sad thing is, the celebrities are too far up their own asses to comprehend what any of this means.  

Don't be like them.  Understand that Ricky Gervais is a Satirist.  Understand that what we witnessed last night wasn't a case of a man being mean.  It was a man performing a piece of Satire.


And finally, learn from satire. Learn to take a joke and then take the true part of it to heart. It may just make you a better person.