She's needs a intervention.

Because this is not okay.  

Yes, of course we all know she has an eating disorder. But, unlike Mary Kate and others who try to hide their struggles underneath yards of loose, figure hiding fabric, Posh seems content to advertise her thinification at every turn. I am not a specialist on eating disorders, but I know enough about anxiety induced control issues to know that this is not "fine."  Not even close.  

And she's using fashion to aid and assist this behavior. Also not okay. Someone at Rock and Republic, please...don't continue to facilitate this.  No, she doesn't need our judgement. She needs help.

Black panneling that concaves inward on the upper thigh. Because, you know, all upper thighs should ideally curve inward at your pubic bone. 

Alexander McQueen. Shame on you. This isn't an illusion. It's an allusion to a sad truth.

And the even sadder truth is that, unless her brain dead husband starts spending less time on the field and more time trying to get her the help she deserves, it will only get worse. Because Posh has just been replaced as the model for the Armani Underwear ad-campaign by none other than another (albeit this time, self-professed) anorexic Megan Fox.  

A lesser of two evils?

And some of you still want to give birth to and raise children in this society? 

You are allowed to procreate only if you have the kinds of kids who shun this type of marketing and instead watch good t.v. and movies.  Like "An Education."  Will be seeing it. In New York. On Saturday. With wine and Alice. Will report back with details.

Initial buzz is that it's AMAZING. A story about the kind of girl you should want your girls to be. Brave. Flawed. Smart. Redeeming.  And Carey Mulligan is definitely not Posh but is still beautiful and so poised.  

Poise.  

I will take poise over "Posh" any day.

Oh. As a P.S....

This is Posh when she was a healthy thin.  This is Megan Fox at 18.  Yes, these are examples of how weight loss can change you.  But in the case of the latter...I don't think the decreased intake of food is the only thing at "work" here. No one changes that much from 18 to 23. No one. Period.

I am in the middle of grading my first batch of papers for ENG 101.

Without continuing the weeping and gnashing of teeth that has been my major mode of communication for the last 24 hours and bringing my lamentations to you (or those of you who have luckily been spared my tirades on "generation stupid"), I will simply summarize by saying...life holds few surprises. First impressions are usually right, and if a group of individuals sound and act dumb...they probably are.

How funny is it then that my faith in my ability to be surprised was revived by the fuckery that is the Twilight franchise?

The "Twilight: New Moon" Soundtrack was released today, and I can testify first hand that it does not suck (this and all subsequent vampire puns are embarrassingly unintentional).  No really. It's really, really good. I mean...look at the artist list:

Girzzly Bear

St. Vincent

Bon Iver

Thom York

Lupe Fiasco

Muse

Sea Wolf

Death Cab

Anya Marina

Lykke Li

The Killers

Ok Go

Band of Skulls

and more....

No shit. Like I said, I'm surprised too.  And they're new songs...some even written specifically for the movie.  That's right...Thom York and the hippest of the hipsters wrote, sang, and recorded ballads to Edward and his angst ridden, sparkling member. 

For those of you who mock the young adult market, let this be a lesson.  Never ever underestimate the economic power of the 12-18 year old female demographic. When united by a common bond, they can topple civilizations.

Now fans just have to hope that the film is a shadowy reflection of the music.

In movie news, the full length trailer for "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus" was released this week.  I dunno how I feel about this.  Scratch that...I do.  

It's kitsch on arrival.  College freshman (male and female) will be ripping down their "Fight Club" posters and slapping this one up in its place. Why? Well, it's the perfect "let's get stoned and go trip out on this crazy movie" movie. And also because, you know, Johnny Depp is, like, soooo hot and dude, Heath Ledger's awesome.

I know, it's a preemptive judgement. But after today, I'll be surprised if I'm ever surprised again.

As noted by Julie,

it has been quite awhile.

Maybe my subconscious was forcing me to stay away from the blog for a bit, because I will be longing to vent about movies from now until December.  

It's Oscar push time.  You know what that means. The Jane Campions will be battling studio giants of Biblical proportions for a chance to get on the Academy Awards stage.  TIFF (Toronto International Film Festival) ended a few weeks ago, and this means the buzz has begun.  Here are some highlights.

"Bright Star"

I was skeptical, and, let's face it,...a jealous little bitch.  I have kept pretty mum about this because A.) I used to pontificate about how someone should cinematically tell the John Keats love story (and therefore somehow thought this meant I owned the idea) and B.) I hadn't seen it.

Well. Tuesday I did see it.  And loved every laborious, tear inducing minute of its 2 hr run time. Ben Whishaw is my new boyfriend, Jane Campion my new hero, and Abby Cornish my first prediction for a Best Actress nomination.  So. So. Good.  Find this film. Drive the next town over if you have to. It's that beautiful. 

For those of you unfamiliar with the story, Keats began writing poetry at around 20. His mother and his brother both died of tuberculosis and at 23, Keats began to see that he was probably doomed to the same fate.  Then, he met Fanny Brawne, the girl who lived literally next door.  They fell in love. He wrote his best poetry during they're two year courtship. But Keats was also aware that he was too poor to marry.  And more importantly, he knew he had contracted TB. At 25, he died. The story is riveting and the film does it complete justice. It's moving without being melodramatic and over the top. Beautiful without being cliched.  Honestly, anymore of my tripe-filled words would only diminish it's extravagance, so I will close by telling you to watch the trailer below.

Next: "Up in the Air"

George Clooney seems like a nice guy.  Probably great to have a beer with. I've never been a huge, huge devotee. He's a decent actor who's gotten better with time and opportunity.  But "Up in the Air" is supposed to be incredible, largely due to Clooney's performance.  And Anna Kendrick, who, until now has been ridiculously under used is just as good. She was amazing in the indie "Rocket Science" and then settled for the Twilight fuckery.  "Up in the Air" will be the one that puts her on the map.  It's directed by Jason Reitman ("Juno," "Thank You For Smoking"). It's about a road warrior (Clooney) whose job it is to fly across the country handling corporate downsizing.  A life of constant travel and laying people off results in exactly what you think it would-a life devoid of feeling. Let the nominations begin.

"Where the Wild Things Are"

It's probably not going to get a nod for best picture, but it'll get some art direction awards, etc. But let's face it, for this movie, awards buzz is irrelevant.  The hype for this thing has been inherent since day one. Add an indie director, a cute kid (I mean...really, how cute is he? And I am not particularly susceptible to-shudder-'children'), and a good soundtrack, and the screen adaptation of WTWTA is celluloid gold. Get ready.

More awards predicts to come.

Love.

Lots to post on, so it's a long one today. 

Fashion Week Covet List, fashion in general, Jennifer's Body, and of course, the unsightly VMA's.

First: Jennifer's Body is getting shit reviews. This is sad because I wanted it to be good. I even pumped it on this very blog.  The movie's concept, although not original, was promising. The timing was right. 

But sometimes, bad acting and directing prevails which is purported to be the case. And, so say many, the script is kinda clunky. Not Cody's best effort.  But what does she care? Juno and United States of Tara have her financial security and indie street cred cemented for life.  

Moving on: Non Fashion Week fashion.

Just because everyone's hiding under tents in NYC trend spotting and blogging while Anna Wintour frowns doesn't mean that fashion isn't happening elsewhere in the wide, wide world. These are two of my favorite things within the last week.

One: Robin Wright Penn. I want your dress.  So badly. I will fly to Toronto and camp out on the TIFF carpet if you will just tell me who made this dress and what organs I need to donate to get it.

Two: I flick through the "Sartorialist" website every once in a while. Sometimes, there are AMAZING looks. Sometimes there is just one too many navy blue, skinny sleeved, tailored business suits for my taste.  But this. I can't explain why.  Although that Prada feather vest she's wearing would cost me a year's salary, this look is completely effortless, different, comfortable, and insanely cool.  She doesn't have to try or chase style. Her subconscious dresses for her.

I know not all of you love the above look.  I also know that some of you don't quite understand my disdain for Eva Longoria's style.  I mean, you are in the majority.  E! Style.com and virtually every celebrity fashion blog puts Longoria on their "Style Star" lists.   This sentiment, however, is seriously misguided.  Just because she's nice, and cute, and bubbly doesn't mean you have to give her fashion props when she doesn't deserve them. Because she doesn't. Eva's wardrobe portfolio reveals that she is simply a 35 year old Lauren Conrad/Hills girl.  The constant parade of princess dresses and poorly designed LBD's is the second tier celebrity and reality star uniform.  It's what you wear when you secretly know you don't have the balls to try your hand at fashion. Because fashion is a risk.  It's dangerous and from time to time you will (and should) fail.  

So Eva sticks to the formula. She dresses like Barbie. 

Strapless princess gown+glitter detailing+girly gossamer=Vomitous. 

Seriously friends.  Do you see it now? Does it finally make sense?! How can you look at Robin Wright Penn's dress next to this and think Eva has great style? Edginess > Swan Princess. 

Fashion Week Covet List:  Oh so so so many things.  Waaaayyy to many to blog about.  So I encourage all of you to go to Vogue.com for full carpet recaps with editorial input AND tons and tons of photos.  What do you like?  Whose collection would you sell your first-born for?

Personally, here are my three key-note collections with an example look from each line-up.

Vera Wang

Not normally a huge Vera Wang fan. But her collection this year is killing me!!! Soooo good. Every piece is stunning.

Preen

Preen's entire collection was beautiful.  I'm moving into a love affair with cool, interestingly tailored pants.  Preen delivers pants/tops/separates and also has lots of simple, easy dresses.  Simple. Easy. Effortless. This is what I'm interested in right now.

And for the dark horse: G-Star. 

Very very London street with hip hop influences. This is totally not my style. The only piece I actually like in the "I would wear that" sense is this one. But the collection as a whole really stands out from the rest of the pack. It's aggressive, tough, and punches you in the face without looking cheap or outdated. 

And lastly. Some words on the VMA's.  My devotion to Taylor Swift despite my hatred for country music has been well vocalized.  She is amazing.  Beautiful, kind, talented, and scary scary smart.  All 19 year olds should try to be as poised as Taylor.  

So, needless to say, I dislike Kanye even more than before.  Sure, he apologized on Leno.  And I actually thought he did a good job of it.  But I doubt he meant it. After all, the proof's in the pudding and Kanye always says he's sorry but never changes his behavior. Which means that deep down inside, he's fine with being an ass hole.  

Besides "the incident" the only other interesting things the VMA's gave us were Gaga (not a huge fan of her music but LOVE her artistry. she is a true performance artist and such a breath of fresh air) and the new Twilight trailer.  Much better than the first movie from the looks of it.  So, if you missed it Twi-fans, here it is.  Maybe Chris Weitz can save the Titanic from sinking.

Movie Trailers - Movies Blog

On Glee:

I am in love with this show.  

Follow the links at the bottom of the page and give it a watch.

We have got to keep this show on the air.

In defense of Glee:

Those of you who know me well know that I'm a cynic.  But I also like to laugh.  Being a cynic who likes to laugh means that I love sarcasm and satire...basically anything that feeds my inner Daria. Humor that is black as night is just the right shade.  A lot of people see this as depressing. I just see it as honest.  If you're completely happy with the way the world is, you are not paying attention or you are just stupid.

But from time to time, the lighter side of my soul recoils in horror at the inky blackness: "Life isn't devoid of beauty or truth!" it screams.  "Happiness is possible. Optimism is an option!"  In my younger years, I would roll my eyes at this little voice and scoff in disdain.  But as I get older, the voice makes more and more sense to me.

Which is why I am in love with "Glee."  Glee, if you aren't hip to it, is a new off-beat, screw-ball musical comedy set in a high school.  The story centers on an optimistic albeit narrow sighted high school teacher who re-instates the school's Glee club.  Of course, only the lowest of the low on the high-school food chain join Glee.  

As such, Glee is one part biting social commentary.  It doesn't overlook life's problems.  All the characters (kids and adults) come complete with their own bags of festering, stinking, life crap. But Glee deals with them in a hilariously funny tounge and cheek way.  And, most importantly, the show refuses to rest in the realm of satire.  Don't get me wrong...the satire is there. 

Example: Best line from last night's episode comes after one of the characters has been attempting to throw up in the school bathroom (she wants to be skinnier so a boy will like her). The guidance counselor sees her bending over the toilet and the following conversation ensues:

Counselor: "Were you just throwing up?"

Girl: "No"

Counselor: "You missed the toilet."

Girl: "No, the girl who was throwing up before me left that. Don't worry. I tried to do it, but I couldn't. I guess I just don't have a gag reflex."

Counselor: "One day, when you're older, that'll turn out to be a gift."

Dark, satirical, funny humor? Check.  But there is also optimism in the show.  The kids really do believe in Glee club.  Will (their teacher) really does believe in them. The musical numbers are sincere and uplifting.  Love, heart, and optimism are at the core of the show.  Glee is about having something to believe in that also makes you happy.

Rachel=my favorite

Glee is smart. It is observant. It gets the fact that life can be horrible. But it also shows that there are parts of life to be joyfully, "glee"-fully celebrated.

And isn't this balance what my soul really needs anyway? Yin and Yang. Light and dark existing in harmony. 

So.....Long live Glee!!!!!!! (aka. please please please FOX network, don't cancel this show).

Glee has only shown two episodes and both are available to watch free with no pirating penalties and in high quality from FOX's website. 

Check them out here!

and to learn more about the show in general: Glee

Apologies for the extended absence.  

Now that I am teaching 18 year olds (they were born in 1992. 1992!!!) about the wonders of reading and writing and driving to and from the middle of bumfuck North Carolina 4x a week, posting has been a little light.  This will be remedied.

For Starters: If you haven't all ready seen it, please please check out Julia Stiles Styles.com.

You're welcome.  Seriously though. How amazing is she?  Colombia English major.  Kat the bad ass in "10 Things."  And she's funny.  Love her.  Want to be her friend.

Next: On Raffa (aka. Rafael Nadal).

I'm not the biggest tennis devotee.  I'll watch a marquee game from time to time and enjoy it though.  Lately, I've been watching more tennis than usual since every major network is broadcasting US Open coverage non-stop.  I like Federer, and Venus, and Novak Djokovic (have you seen his You Tube sketch where he makes fun of all his famous tennis friends?  Hysterical. And even better: Djokovic pronounced "joke-o-vich" actually means "joker" in Serbia.)

But I've never been on the Raffa wagon.  Maybe it was the icky hair; it makes him look like he belongs on the cover of a Harlequin Romance novel. See?

I also strongly suspect the white pedal pusher pants had a lot to do with it.  And the bandanas.  

 

Harlequin Romance Raffa

White Pants=Bad.  White Pedal Pushers=Worse.

I'm not saying he's gross looking. His face is decent.  But his body, although undoubtedly athletic, has always seemed rather feminine to me.  Soft hips (rather than angular and pointy). Rotund, full ass.  Sloping shoulders instead of the broad type most tennis players develop.  

But yesterday, something changed.  I don't know what or why.  He still has a feminine figure.  He's still wearing the bandana (the pedal pushers, thank heaven, seem to have gone into retirement and the long locks have been cut).  But I like him now.  A lot.  He won me.  I think it's his attitude.  Always calm, always poised, but intense enough to fist pump during a strongly fought point.  Also-he's hurt right now. You can tell.  But he's playing through it, and playing well.

Most impressive though: he's honest.  This guy is probably the most honest person in the sport.  I watched him over-rule the line judge and call for a replay on a point that went against him.  The judge called it in. Nadal knew it was out.  He was right and this impressed the hell out of me. David (whose been a huge fan for a long time says Nadal does this regularly).

Raffa, you didn't have me at hello, but you do now.  But be forewarned.  I'm a fickle bitch.  I reserve the right to remove my approval if you turn out to be an Andy RodDICK.

Last: Fashion Week has begun.  Get ready.  I will be watching and commenting. Stay tuned.

Love.

On the heels of last weeks post...

Do NOT let this happen!!!!!!!!!!  This CAN NOT happen!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck. Leave it to American to ruin yet another amazing show.

I have already talked about "Skins" in the past.  For those of you new to the blog, "Skins" is a BAFTA (British equivalent to the Emmys/Oscars) winning drama that centers on the lives of a group of teenagers living in Bristol.  It is hyper-realistic and super gritty.  

Since 16 is age of consent in England, there is prolific swearing, drug use, and full frontal nudity in this show.  The writers and directors take HUGE risks.  I will warn you again, "Skins" feels a little weird and uncomfortable sometimes. 

BUT this is ONLY because we stupid US t.v. watchers aren't used to being challenged by what we see in front of us.  We like t.v. to turn our brains to mush. But it doesn't have to.  It can be amazing like "Skins"- a bad ass, challenging, and entertaining show.

Of course this means that MTV wants nothing more than to ruin it.  Oh, they will say that they are sticking to the original spirit of the show, blah blah blah, but honestly, the people at MTV aren't stupid. No really, listen to me for a minute. These people are business geniuses.  They know what sells.  

And what sells in America is the Hills. And Gossip Girl.  Things that pretend to be edgy, but don't really push their viewers to consider anything other than if they like the outfits the characters are wearing.  US t.v. caters to nothing but the "lowest common denominator."  Which is why the US version of "Skins" will pussy out and blow. Hard.  

The deals have already been made, the rights have been bought. US Skins is going into production.  PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE....watch the original before this happens.  You will not regret it.  You will be challenged and uncomfortable and confused at first by what you are seeing. Yes, it can be dark at times. But the rewards are endless.

Quit allowing yourself to be lazy and watch shit television. This is your challenge America.  

I know I have already posted this, but this is the first few minutes of Season 1, Episode 1. Watch it. (You can watch other eps. on Surf The Channel.com or even buy it super cheap from i-tunes if the illegal way bothers you...I think it's actually less than a buck an episode.)

EPISODE ONE: TONY

Enjoy.